It All Started With My Sister...

Two of my blogger friends have recently nominated me for awards. I don't know if they were aware at the time they linked to me, but I love getting awards. It is almost unhealthy. Sometimes I think it is the competitiveness that was born into me, the spirit that made me try to chew off my sister's toes when I was three and poison her with my Aqua Velva magic potions whenever anyone referred to her as "cute" and referred to me as "the smart one." I think I've come a long way, not having tried to physically harm anyone in quite some time. Although, there is that five year old I keep running into at the 5k runs about town. I kept myself from tripping her during the "Run Away With Cirque du Soleil 5k," but her ass was grass at the Six Tunnels 5k a few months later.

Granted, I couldn't breathe when I crossed the finish line, but still...

With that said, you can imagine how excited I was to receive the following awards. I bet that five year old doesn't even know what an adverb is yet. Amateur.

Thanks to the lovely Nicole Ducleroir at One Significant Moment at a Time for the Blogger Buddie Award. Five things about me, five recipients:

1. I haven't eaten meat in seven days and only because I saw the documentary Food, Inc. When I ordered shrimp the other night Mr. J looked at me quizzically. I just smiled, "They're little. They can't feel as much pain." His argument? "You're little. Don't you feel pain?" I'm just so hungry.

2. I want to host a sit in with the cast of The Bachelor. I will have a flip chart and my sharpies, maybe even Post Its. I will invite Dr. Drew and Oprah. We're getting down to the bottom of this cesspool.

3. I hate doing laundry. Well, I will put it in the wash. I'll even move it to the dryer. After that? Those pants are on their own.

4. The two boys in my life have some alpha male issues. Toby has four legs and pees on Mr. J's suit jackets and I sneak them to the dry cleaners so I don't have to listen to them argue.

5. February hated me. Not one thing went my way. Two accidents, fraud on my checking account, big deals fell through and lots of surprises. None of them good. I am fairly certain that this means March is my bitch. Hold on to your horses, kids. Something good is coming my way.

And, I bestow such lovely Blogger Buddie Award to the following lovely and delicious bloggers:

Sharon Kendrew at Reality Covered in Chocolate

Erica at Laugh. Write. Play.

Karen at Novels During Naptime

Shelli at Market My Words

Christina at Write Brained

And, moving on to another award near and dear to my dirty little heart, the fantastmalicious Sarah at Sarah With A Chance, who incidentally is known for creating words (above word was designed in her honor) nominated me for the Creative Writer Blogger Award, which requires six lies and a truth. My dear readers must comment as to which they think is the actual, honest to goodness truth, cross my heart, blah blah blah.

1. I used to be in a square dancing troupe. We toured and wore petticoats and bandanas. Word.

2. I can tie a cherry stem in a knot and still look cute while doing it. No wrinkled nose, nor eyes glazed over in concentration. If you're going to tie a cherry stem in a knot you have to do it while making sex eyes.

3. I used to illegally race cars when I lived in Florida. I dated a guy with a souped up Honda and once modeled for a low budget car calendar for the body shop he worked at during the day.

4. I can weld, lay sod and could have had a career in roofing had I not decided the hot tar made me stinky. Who wants to kiss a stinky girl?

5. I once saved a little girl from a runaway Radio Flyer. Her mother made me spaghetti. I wouldn't go home. It became awkward. Well, for them. I loved my new family.

6. I once tried to stage a breakout at the local veterinarian's office. It did not go well.

7. I secretly hate real estate agents. Well, most of them. If you're one then you're one of the ones I like. I just don't like the rest of them.

Not only are the following bloggers truly creative, I think their lists would be quite telling:

LiLa of Lisa and Laura Write fame

Kimberly Derting at The Road to Publication

Purple Clover

Elana Johnson

Tam at Crazy Is Relative

The Belles at Plot This

And the debut blogger, Marc at The Loser Historian. I don't know if he'll accept this lovely little challenge, but I sure hope he does. I can't wait to try to figure out the difference between his lies and his truth. Those of you who don't know him, he's a writer I met in NYC at the Backspace Conference. He has a large brain, a knack for history and is a total smart ass. Perfect combination.

I like to think I'm bringing people together, making introductions, breaking down walls.

Just don't challenge me to arm wrestle.

I get a little feisty.

**Please note I have been unable to upload the pics that go with these awards. Something about corrupted files and such.**